The Playlists
by Ending Howard
Summary: Why don't we try something new? Something none of us would ever do. Foul language and violence. NaToki.
1. The Sonnet

And so it was, the bird flew away,  
never to be seen once again;  
the world taught it to fly that day,  
making the blue, blue sky very plain.

The bird had flown a great distance that time,  
no communications, migrations, that year.  
He simply sat, perched on a small dime,  
whispering, 'I have nothing more to fear.

'I admit that I regret that day,  
not saving him before it was too late.  
I wished I wouldn't have to fly away,  
after being reminded of that date.

'He will always be with me, in my heart,  
even though the Swede tore us apart.' 


	2. Not Many Views

It was such a simple task: create a playlist.

Every music artist, or band, had advertised for them, and it was their turn to pay them back. Ofdensen told them to make their own playlist and publish it online, and several people would buy the other artists' albums.

They all thought it was a shitty idea at first, but the majority of them had pretty good taste in music.

Murderface mainly chose classic rock, like AC/DC, Kiss, Alice Cooper, and Motley Crue, as though they hadn't sold enough albums already.

Skwisgaar chose foreign music that almost no fan could understand, yet bought them anyway.

Nathan chose all-Dethklok music, causing Ofdensen to scold him, and also for them to make a million-odd dollars.

Pickles chose stuff like Rage Against the Machine, Smashing Pumpkins, and Puddle of Mudd. This surprised the entire band; they thought he'd choose something similar to Murderface. That proved how little they knew about each other.

Toki's, on the other hand, was the most diverse, but no one--except Ofdensen, of course--even knew he made a playlist. He refused to show it to any of his bandmates, and had Ofdensen block access to Toki's playlist from any computer at Mordhaus, other than his own. And Ofdensen's. Ofdensen had to be involved in everything Dethklok-related.

And of course, several artists, record companies, etc. were awarded with millions of dollars.

And after the playlists were created, the band became bored. There were no court dates, and groupies were extremely annoying. They would simply soak in the hot tub, play video games, or perform other random, meaningless tasks. This day, however, they were all eating dinner when they started to talk to each other about more meaningful things, like a new album.

And it led absolutely nowhere.

Pickles had suggested doing a re-make of "Bulls on Parade", but Nathan didn't enjoy that idea. He didn't think he could sing that song. Murderface wanted a bass solo, and everyone said "Hell no" in unison. Skwisgaar suggested a lead guitar solo, and this earned a raised eyebrow and "Don't you have enough solos?" from Nathan. Toki simply played with his mashed potatoes, making the occasional chuckle or sigh . This was out of character for him, as Toki was normally chipper and talkative. Finally, the meal ended, and as they began to flood out, Nathan felt a tap on the shoulder, and turned around to see Toki.

Toki simply stared at him, not knowing why he tapped his shoulder in the first place. Nathan, however, had something to say:

"You were really quiet at dinner."

Toki shrugged. "I's did-int's feels likes talkings," he explained, looking downward.

Okay, there was definitely something screwed up with Toki. Nathan attempted to make eye contact with the Norwegian, and when that failed, he grabbed a few strands of his bangs and pulled, causing Toki's head to jerk upward. Nathan would've grabbed his chin, but he didn't want to make much contact with Toki's skin. It was enough that he was asking him what was wrong, right?

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Nathan asked as Toki flushed. "I-I-I's . . ." the guitarist stuttered, speechless. "I's gots to goes!" He exclaimed, attempting to make a break for his room. However, Nathan blocked him off with an arm. When Toki tried to free himself, he failed. Nathan was stronger than that, after all.

"Look, Toki," Nathan began. "First you're not talking at dinner, then you tap me on the shoulder and say nothing, and try to retreat. I'm going to ask you again, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

Toki turned his head to the left to stare at the singer. Toki's lip was slightly quivering, and he looked like he was about to cry. "It's justs . . . " he began. "Nobodies on these fanbase looks at my's playlists," he explained.

Nathan raised an eyebrow. Okay, he knew that Ofdensen had blocked all the band off from viewing it, but what about the band? Was this the reason?

Toki sighed. "It's has 25 tho , , , thow . . . thisands views," he explained. The number of views was quite a lot, actually. But compared to the rest of Dethklok . . . hell, Murderface had 5 million.

Nathan glanced at the Norwegian. "That's it?" he asked. Toki nodded glumly.

"Let me see your playlist."

Toki glanced up in disbelief. "Uh-err . . . okays, just . . ."

Nathan stared at him expectantly. "Just what?"

Toki frowned. "Don'ts makes funs of mes," he explained.

Nathan resisted the urge to chuckle as Toki began walking towards his room. "I won't," he promised. What? He had Madonna or Hannah Montana on it or something? Well, if he had that, he would absolutely have to laugh. He wouldn't be able to resist it.

Eventually, they reached Toki's room, and the guitarist immediately stepped inside to reveal his childish room, complete with his teddy bear on the bed and model airplanes hanging from the ceiling. Nathan ignored the freaky-ass pictures of Toki's parents on the walls and headed straight for the computer, opening up iTunes, followed by a playlist titled, "'his's songses'".

"Is this it?" Nathan asked, looking at Toki. Toki nodded, who glanced at the small group of songs on the page.

He had only compiled 11 songs into a playlist, and though it wasn't a very big majority, most of them were by Incubus. He read the playlist carefully, coming to a song that he might like. "Hey, what's 'Psycho' about?" he asked.

Toki shrugged, leaning over Nathan to the keyboard and mouse, and pulled up a document titled "his's songses liriks'". Nathan scrolled through them, and judging by the title of the playlist and file, Toki apparently copied and pasted the lyrics rather than writing them out himself. The lyrics to "Psycho" were quite interesting, but Nathan was mainly concentrated on why the majority of them had to do with love or suicide.

"Toki"  
"Yes"  
"Why is this playlist like this"  
"I's likes za songses"  
"But, the title is 'His Songs'. Who is 'he'?"

At this, Toki flushed almost automatically. He fiddled with his fingers, then returned his gaze to Nathan. "You's dont's wants to knows."

"I won't tell," Nathan promised.

е, jeg er sikker pЕ at du ikke vil, Toki thought, which meant, "Oh, I'm sure you won't." Toki immediately stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I cant's says," he explained.

Nathan raised an eyebrow and decided to use the process of elimination.

"Ofdensen"  
"Noes"  
"Skwisgaar"  
"Noes"  
"Murderface"  
"Noes"  
"Pickles"  
"Noes"  
"Jean-Pierre"  
"Noes"  
"A fan"  
"Noes"  
"Someone in Norway"  
"Noes"  
". . . me?"

Toki looked at Nathan and clenched his eyes shut, managing a slight nod.

The singer stared at him, speechless. Songs about love and suicide? Was Toki . . .

"Toki, are you . . . er, in l--"

Toki nodded before Nathan could finish the sentence.

The singer lay back in the chair, and always reminded himself to never ask what was wrong.

Again. 


	3. Something

What to say?

He was speechless.

Songs about love and suicide . . . dedicated to **Nathan**, no less.

Was this why Toki wouldn't let them see it?

Toki buried his face in his hands, refusing to show his face to Nathan. The singer was weirded out at this, of course, but what else was he going to do? He hesitantly reached up and patted Toki on the shoulder, saying, "It's . . . er, okay . . ." He twitched at that. It wasn't his thing to comfort people.

Toki finally looked up, his eyes red and his face blotchy. "Noes, its isn'ts," he snapped. "It'll never bes."

Nathan raised an eyebrow. "W . . . what're you saying?" he asked.

Toki looked at Nathan for a long moment before sighing. "Listens to numbers two." Toki instructed, burying his face in his hands once more.

"'Breakdown'?" Nathan questioned. He'd never heard of the song before; then again, he hardly listened to anything outside of his own music. This, to him, was actually a pretty good song; and he could immediately tell what it was about.

"Toki . . ." Nathan began, looking at the sobbing Norwegian. He shook his head, refusing to look at Nathan; the singer sighed. "Is this . . . true?" he asked, face serious.

You probably wouldn't be able to tell from Toki's current position, but he nodded and sniffled a little bit.

_Oh come on_, Nathan thought to himself. _Help the poor kid out._

Nathan wasn't one to show affection. Hell, he hardly said anything when he was with Rebecca.

Then again, he hated Rebecca.

Toki knew this, and that made Nathan's hug all the more . . . well, what was the right word? It was like having your parents get back together after a divorce.

Especially because of Toki's emotions.

The Norwegian didn't dare hug the other man; hell, he didn't want to die today. He knew what Nathan was capable of.

Then, he changed his mind.

Nathan was a little disturbed about it, but he didn't really want the band to fall apart; as if the rhythm guitarist being in love with the lead singer didn't make it bad enough. But hell, Toki was hurting. And they couldn't have a depressed bandmate. It just wasn't right. Though he did squirm a bit when Toki hugged him back.

The guitarist immediately pulled away and averted his eyes. "I--I's sorries . . ." he muttered.

"Don't worry about it," Nathan replied. _What the fuck are you doing?_ he thought. _Stop being so sympathetic!_

Toki continued to stare away, though. "I must's," he explained. "You don't's returns my feeling." Toki just knew in his heart that Nathan wasn't in love with him. He just _knew_.

Nathan sighed. "Maybe not before, but . . ." he couldn't believe he was about to say what popped into his head. "Maybe we can . . . try . . . it?"

Toki beamed, then turned to face the singer. "Is you's serious?" he asked incredulously.

Nathan hesitantly nodded. How bad could it be, right? It made the kid happy, and no-one had to find out.

Oh, shit. He didn't think Toki knew that.

"Look," Nathan began. "Nobody can know about this. We'll lose our popularity, we'll lose the band . . . everything."

Toki frowned, but he understood. He didn't want to lose the band . . . or the fans.

Nathan couldn't believe what he'd done, but it was better than a depressed guitarist.

Was it really?


End file.
